Saturday, November 26, 2011

Let The Big Dawg Eat!

The Dawgs take prehistoric Grant Field to win their tenth consecutive game this season and to secure the 10th victory in eleven tries over the Nerds during the Richt era. It will be embattled Coach Mark Richt testing wits with the Great Paul Johnson. The same Paul Johnson that Senator Blutarsky reminds us was able to lose to the two worst Georgia teams fielded under Richt. Of course, Georgia is headed to the SEC Championship Game next week while Tech will wait by the phone for the Emerald Nuts Bowl to call. But if you think these Dawgs are overlooking the North Avenue Trade School, you will be mistaken. Hating Tech is bred in the bone of all Bulldogs and our players will be ready to squish the bugs again like always.

 In honor of Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate Week I have penned a few limericks that I posted on Twitter. I am now posting them here for my non-Twitter friends to see. Some are good, some are a little wanting, but they're free so what the hell...

There once was a nerd named Looper, he went to Tech - how super, call it divinity, he lost his virginity, to a handsome fellow stormtrooper.

There was a young Techie in a daze, his vision was blurred by a haze, it happened again, number 9 out of 10, the Dawgs won it as always.

The Techie said not to fear, as his frown went ear to ear, woefully he quipped, our ass just got whipped, maybe we will win it next year.

Pardon if I am remiss, for failing to hammer on this, all they can win, is 1 out of 10, and their uniform is the color of piss.

Joe was a Techie for life, but his days were full of strife, since dressed as ObiWan, he went to Dragon Con, n made a real Wookie his wife.

Here comes Wrambling Wreck - a'hoy, Marching Yellow Jackets - oh joy, we love game day, no we're not gay, OhmyGod Look - it's Flag Boy!!!

Techie went hunting by the water, he was equipped for the slaughter, saw a naked dame, asked if she was game, she said "yes" so he shot her.

At Tech it's always in style, and sure to make the nerds smile, to get with the boys, crank up the noise, and have a sweet tickle pile.

Tech plays football-who knew, and wins over Georgia are few, but year after year, they whine and they jeer, soon we'll be the boss of you.

At Tech it's every boy's wish, to become part of a niche, rule the whole school, and be super cool, like Mohamed, Clayton and Jugdish.

Oh the Tech Man does cry, no matter how hard he'll try, he still can't get laid, without her getting paid, and the title in '90 was a tie!

Paul Johnson's a douche for sure, his ass-hattery is without cure, a one trick pony, we'll prove he's a phony, another loss he will soon endure.

There once was a Techie from Nantucket, whose teams always did suck it, he said with chagrin, as he took it on the chin, we'll never beat Georgia - aww fuck it!

There once was a coach called CPJ, his fans whined and cried about UGA, he said with disgrace, punch'em in the face, then lost to 'em again the next day!

There once was a QB named Ball, he lost to the Dawgs every fall, with a failing SAT score, he couldn't count to 4, he clocked the last down - great call!

The nerd fan base was ecstatic, cheers for the Jackets were emphatic, Humanitarian Bowl at 10:00 am, despite losing to Georgia again, Hey 7-6 it's totally Chantastic!

There once was a girl at Tech, she wasn't very cute. That is all.

You'll work for us someday, that's what the Tech men say, when year after year after year, the Jackets give them little to cheer, since they are owned by U-G-A!

The Jackets band was so cute, when it sneaked behind the Redcoats to toot, then came Glory Glory, and the scared nerds did scurry, crapping their mustard pants en route!  This was a request from Jen_eration_X based on this video:

There once was a trade school in the hood, had a football team that wasn't good, excuse making aplenty, not even Top 20, if you aren't laughing at Tech - you should.

A Tech Man needs no introduction, great are his skills of deduction, if two teams were in yellows, he'd recognize his fellows, by their unmistakable suction.

Tech once had a coach named John Heisman, his name is known by every fan, the trophy that bears his name, no Jacket player can claim, though two each Georgia and Navy can.  

Tech nerds have a race on a tricycle, it is cute to watch the dorks giggle, they laugh and they play, chase the girls away, then they make a big pile and tickle. Another request from Jen_eration_X based on this video:

There once was a Techie who couldn't steer, Crushed the Ramblin' Wreck from front to rear, it was not insured, Dawgs laughter long endured, But that boy's a hell of an engineer.

No Chan no Reggie no Little Joe, No Goose no Calvin no Randy Rhino, a new breed of nerds, to hate like lizards, as we win number 10 in a row.

UPDATE: Rex Robinson kicked in (pun intended) with a few limericks that were brilliant:

There once was a coach at THE JOKE, who seldom thought when he spoke. He constantly cried about fish seldom fried, but never acknowledged he choked.

One of Tech's biggest regrets, was letting Reggie say DOWN! SET! With one down to go, which he didn't know, he decided to "hedge" his last bet!

In the first half with time running out, the game still somewhat in doubt, Blair had a miss but hey, what is this? Fryer Schmuck called a timeout? (Obviously this was done after the game)

And Gadget Dawg offered these beauties:

There was a man on the flats, whose brain was too big for his hats, he thought it was smart, to insult folks from Walmart, but oops!, it was run by a Gnat!

There once was a coach, oh so smug, with an annoying smirk on his mug, his team cannot pass, he looks like an ass, and he sat in the hole his mouth dug!

So here we are... 2 hours from kickoff. Grantham's Dawgs will be ready to stuff the triple option early and often. Look for Aaron Murray to have a big first half and our running backs to have a big second half as we grind Tech into the turf.

Go Dawgs, GATA!!!



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Greg Pope

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