Kiss My Ass, Kick My Ass, Kick Your Ass: Season 3, Volume 3

Kiss My Ass -Andre Ware.

Last week during the broadcast of the Florida - Kentucky game, as the Florida defense made Kentucky QB Morgan Newton look like, well, Morgan Newton, the Kentucky defense was busy making Florida QB Jeff Driskel look a little like Aaron Murray. So much so, that Andre Ware actually declared Driskel the best QB in the SEC. That's quaint Andre, but awfully premature. Through four games this season Murray has 1092 yards, 10 TDs and a rating of 182. Bama's AJ McCarron has 819 yards, 10 TDs and a 188 rating. Sackerlina's Connor Shaw and Dylan Thompson each have a rating of 166 and better stats than Driskel though with less plays due to Shaw's injury. Even Tyler Wilson for the hapless Razorbacks has 982 yards, 8 TDs and a 177 rating. Your boy has 698 yards, 4 TDs and a rating of 158. Maybe, one day, Driskel will be the best QB in the SEC, but right now, that honor belongs to Aaron Murray, A.J McCarron, or Connor Shaw. For making such an asinine comment, Andre Ware can Kiss My Ass.


Kick My Ass - Marlon Brown.

Watching Marlon Brown absorbing all of these passes into his huge mitts this season and seeing how defenders just bounce off of his big frame have caused me to realize that he is a tough customer and not someone I would want to tangle with. He is listed at 6-5 and 215. He doesn't have a big weight advantage on me, but he has the reach, youth and those big hands that definitely make big fists that make me certain that if provoked, Marlon Brown would Kick My Ass.



Kick Your Ass - Tyler Bray.

Tennessee QB Tyler Bray is (or at least was) a cocky little shit who had (and maybe still has) a punkish little habit of celebrating big plays like a total douche bag. It appears like a double throat slit, but I think those are automatic penalties now so maybe it is some other similar gesture. Anyway, for a string bean who hasn't won any big games, I don't get the cockiness. Maybe he has toned that down. He hasn't had much to celebrate against UGA in two tries and hopefully won't have anything to celebrate this Saturday. Tyler, I saw where you and Aaron Murray became friends at the Manning Camp this summer, still, because you are going to be trying to beat our Georgia Bulldogs this weekend, I think it would be a good time to just up and Kick Your Ass.